Update on life and the wedding event
Dear diary,
I think that now's about time to talk about feelings and what I want to do with this life.
So far my masters degree feels like I'm stuck without direction nor progress, it feels really bad to be honest, I doubt if I get through
Lately have been having lots of fights with SO. For now things have indeed deescalate and I would say it's a good patch of time.
Right now just trying to process all those feelings I'm having, again, there's always 2 sides of me, one who's just plain tired with masters, there isn't much break, it's a long ass marathon, not sprints, at least for degree you get semester breaks, which I agree, don't last long but it's a break non the less.
The other side who's like, yo, no stress, just do your best, everything is fine, honestly, everything's just in your head ya know.
A bit sad that SO is going away for good and I'm also pretty stressed about the Japan conference, and my dumb ass proposal defense. But, you know, if I fail, I fail, it's alright, the salary will get stripped away but I think that's okay.
Sometimes I just want to chill and relax and open up a slow little restaurant somewhere and just, make tasty things and feeding people, but, here I am, face to face with an emotionless machine most of the time, doing my work in total isolation. Every time I tell people that I literally have no colleagues they are shocked like, what? You do things alonee? And usually, in my head response goes like yeahh, that's how I do important things all my life.
But yeah, I don't know, I do have the desire to get socialized and have fun and party and just be immersed in this world. But, oh well, let's just hope I don't regret anything when I get older, so many things to experience so little time, the night life world draws me near sometimes. Either that or the corporate thingy.
I wanna dress up , put make up, act pretty, talk to random people about random things, going around, let them show me interesting things.
But ok, the condition I have right now is better than I've expected 5 years ago I think.I've kinda done all the things I want to do.
It's true, friends are split into 2 groups, the fun but not that stable pack and the functional stable pack.
For some reason feels kinda anxious right now, jeezus. Why do I always feel this way, I just want to be zen, gahd dammit.
Thank you future me for seeing me rant
On a lighter note, the wedding is over, the 120 soap is over. Here's some pictures.
I think that now's about time to talk about feelings and what I want to do with this life.
So far my masters degree feels like I'm stuck without direction nor progress, it feels really bad to be honest, I doubt if I get through
Lately have been having lots of fights with SO. For now things have indeed deescalate and I would say it's a good patch of time.
Right now just trying to process all those feelings I'm having, again, there's always 2 sides of me, one who's just plain tired with masters, there isn't much break, it's a long ass marathon, not sprints, at least for degree you get semester breaks, which I agree, don't last long but it's a break non the less.
The other side who's like, yo, no stress, just do your best, everything is fine, honestly, everything's just in your head ya know.
A bit sad that SO is going away for good and I'm also pretty stressed about the Japan conference, and my dumb ass proposal defense. But, you know, if I fail, I fail, it's alright, the salary will get stripped away but I think that's okay.
Sometimes I just want to chill and relax and open up a slow little restaurant somewhere and just, make tasty things and feeding people, but, here I am, face to face with an emotionless machine most of the time, doing my work in total isolation. Every time I tell people that I literally have no colleagues they are shocked like, what? You do things alonee? And usually, in my head response goes like yeahh, that's how I do important things all my life.
But yeah, I don't know, I do have the desire to get socialized and have fun and party and just be immersed in this world. But, oh well, let's just hope I don't regret anything when I get older, so many things to experience so little time, the night life world draws me near sometimes. Either that or the corporate thingy.
I wanna dress up , put make up, act pretty, talk to random people about random things, going around, let them show me interesting things.
But ok, the condition I have right now is better than I've expected 5 years ago I think.I've kinda done all the things I want to do.
It's true, friends are split into 2 groups, the fun but not that stable pack and the functional stable pack.
For some reason feels kinda anxious right now, jeezus. Why do I always feel this way, I just want to be zen, gahd dammit.
Thank you future me for seeing me rant
On a lighter note, the wedding is over, the 120 soap is over. Here's some pictures.
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| The view from the presidential suite, the whole place is huge, you can play hide and seek on the balcony(if it's not scorching hot) it's luxurious, old style, but luxurious. |
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| Yay, the soap that I made, they look delicious, like cheese |
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| The original design |
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| What it ended up becoming, everyone loved the design, I hope they were genuine |
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| How twas arranged |
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| A wobbly panaroma of how the whole place looked |
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| Huge swing in the middle |
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| Upwards from the ground photography strikes! |
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| Just wanna note how beautiful their voices were |
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